Happy New Year loves!
I know it’s definitely time for an update on my blog. Truthfully, I have been kind of overwhelmed, but very well (I know that’s confusing, but praying that you feel me after reading this post haha)!
I am extremely grateful for where I am in life. I have a job which allows me to pay my bills and also found a hobby I love, which allows me to express myself creatively- YouTube! I am content with everything and although that doesn’t mean everything is perfect, I am walking with God who supplies me with his grace every day. However, lately, I have been in deep thought after realizing that I am almost at 5K on my YouTube channel. It’s honestly a blessing. I genuinely enjoy doing videos and I find it so cool that I have can actually look back on my growth. On the flip side, it’s scary!
When I do videos, I put out my feelings, where I am in my life and may talk about struggles I’ve overcame at that moment. Basically, I share personal information about me! But, what if I change for a season/for a moment? Will I be criticized when I open up more? That thought has literally been running through my mind this week.
I feel that some may categorize me as this “holier than thou Christian girl”, however I am not perfect. On my blog/YouTube channel I may talk about tips that helped me in a certain season, but then I may end up struggling again. I make mistakes on a day to day. I sin on a day to day basis just like every child of God and that is not an excuse to do what I want, but I say that to say no one is perfect.
As my supporters increase, I want to start showing a bit more of ME! However, will I still have a strong support system as I open up my life more and more as I get comfortable? Will people pray for me when something I do doesn’t “sit well with them” or will they criticize me? It’s honestly a scary thing and at this point I have to break free from that.
I am a Christian, who loves makeup, talks about life and fashion. I struggle like you all do, I watch different TV shows (not only sermons), I listen to different genres of music (not only Gospel), I go to different places when I hang out (not only church) and I can go on and on. God loves me as much as he loves you and there is room for all of us at the cross ! As I open up my life more and more, I don’t want to be categorized as just a holier than thou Christian girl. Yes, I will glorify God and continue to share what has been put on my heart to share, but I want to be raw and real as well. Being Christian isn’t a walk in the park. It’s just not me throwing out bible verses. It’s not me just “showing you how much of a Christian I am”, but you being able to see the God I serve in me through my actions regardless of what season I may be in.
This year I declare to be intentionally me. Shamelessly me! I pray that you all will continue to support me as I transition to opening up more. Continue to pray for me throughout all seasons, as I will be doing the same for you. Stay prayerful, dream big and work hard for your dreams this year!
Love you all so much!
xoxo,
E
Don’t let them get to you, girl! Keep doing you. I’m currently trying to grow my faith as well and how I see it is, your relationship with God is your relationship with God. That’s it. That’s my response when anyone tries to pull the holy card.
Keep inspiring us!
xo,
Michaela
Very honest girl! I feel like Social media can be used as a shallow promotion of success or it can be used to truly change people’s lives; and truly changing people’s lives mean being real and authentic. Youtube is a space where I feel people watch and wich they had the life the youtuber has without knowing that he or she is probably struggling with the same thing they are! The grass is definitely not greener on the other side! This blog is beautiful Emari 🙂 -Leanne