I recently opened up on my Instagram about my therapy journey. During the pandemic, we really had no choice but to do some deeper self work. While reflecting, I discovered somethings that could be worked on and some repeating patterns that affect my daily life. I think that being a content creator, you’re often placed on a pedestal as if you have no problems. We are often seen as extroverts, while no one really knows what you’re dealing with behind your brand and no one really knows you as a whole. I hope that y’all know, even as a believer and a content creator I struggle like everyone else.
I create and show up for my platform even though I deal with anxiety and self- sabotaging habits.
I honestly was up in the air about therapy because it’s often looked down upon in the Christian and Black community, two of which I identify with of course. Being a Christian, some people believe that you are rejecting God when you seek out professional help instead of “praying certain issues away”. In the black community, it’s always been said that “your business is your business”, so people are often walking around with pain and bitterness with hurtful past experiences tucked away in the back of their mind. I want to change that narrative and I believe my generation is doing a great job with discussing this.
So, I did it! I finally started the search for a therapist. I personally decided to start therapy because I often struggle with anxiety and negative self talk when it comes to my goals. Anxiety is something that I honestly never felt as a child, however as I got older (more experiences), I started to get anxious and even started to have panic attacks. I honestly thought this was normal, but it’s not. I had to come to terms that I don’t want to live this way and seeking out additional help doesn’t make me less than or crazy. I’m doing this for me, my family and my relationships.
As of right now, I feel like I have three jobs: a special education teacher, content creator and finding a therapist. Girl, it’s a lot! I’m willing to do the work though. At first, it was discouraging when I received countless emails about therapists not taking my insurance, not being about to afford $300+ sessions, and availability issues. I took a week off and then started my search again, and now that work is finally paying off. I have consultations scheduled which is a small win to me.
I hope that this post encourages you or even gives you insight into what people may be going through. I always share with purpose because this is what connects us- our story. I’ll be updating you guys as I go!
Until next time y’all <3